Single Women

I read an interesting piece in the Economist today about the rise of singletons all over the world. Young generation seems to be less committed to the obligations of starting families and carrying the family line. Several reasons were raised to explain this global trend, as to China, the Economist argues that "selection for male babies promise a generation of bachelors with diminished conjugal prospects." This may explain why so many young men are still single, but it doesn't show the full picture.

The urban-rural difference in China is probably bigger than most people can imagine. When high-speed trains roar across Beijing, Shanghai and other major cities, some villagers in Western China still lack stable access to clean water and other sanitation facilities. Similarly, when most peasants firmly preferred boys to girls, urban population already showed a balanced growth of two genders. Therefore in theory heterosexual young men in rural area do have problems in finding a mate because of the imbalanced gender ratio. Studies on marital status of migrant workers in cities may confirm my assumptions. However diminished conjugal prospects are not only presented to rural young men, but to urban young women as well. These people are usually born and brought up in benign family environments, receive good education and have decent careers, which makes them or their families reluctant to accept guys from significantly inferior background or careers. As a result, in the marriage market, the excess supply of rural males does not quite meet the demand of urban females.

The rise in singleton also reflects the progress in gender equality in the last decades. Women are no longer dependent on men: they receive education, find jobs and become financially independent. Though gender discrimination still exists in companies and governments, senior level-positions in particular, women are encouraged to receive education and get involved in social activities. As Mao said, "Women can hold up half the sky." (妇女能顶半边天.) De facto status boost for women has an internal conflict with some traditional custom which still advocates male chauvinism. The situation is worst in rural area and north China: e.g. in some places women are not allowed to dine with their husbands on the same table during big festivals. Stories about city wives unable to bear domestic violence, which is pretty common in countryside and north, have been revealed by media, and provoke hot discussions. Many women end with singleton in their thirties if they are unable to find someone who truly appreciate their talent and respect their dignity.

Marriage has different meanings for my generation compared to older ones. It's still viewed as an obligation and singletons in their thirties/forties do suffer from extra social pressures for having "something wrong." However my peers realize that they have the choice and capacity to choose either marriage or singleton, and can better avoid marrying someone that they do not love out of financial pressures. All this said, due to the reasons that the Economist has listed, e.g. low carbon footprint, etc, I'm still pro-marriage.

(http://goo.gl/JfZpP)